Dec 29 2008
∞
How the U.S. will be split up after it collapses in 2010.Why this is crap:
- Tennessee, Kentucky, the Carolinas, and West Virginia are unlikely ever to split from the Southern states. Ever. And if you think that any of these states would be excited to join the effete, socialist, atheist evil that is Europe (regardless of whether this is true), you’re crazy.
- If you think the Midwest will ever allow itself to be turned over to the effete, socialist, atheist evil that is Canada, you’re crazy.
- Mexico? Really?
- If you were looking for the prime choices for who would go to Canada, I think you’d be better off talking to Washington and Northwestern Oregon. I think we’d all happily sell our souls to Canada.
- If China ever decides it wants to assert its dominance over America, it won’t be satisfied with just taking the Western half. We’ll all be speaking Chinese, my friends. I don’t think they’re really interested in ruling us, to be honest. They just want to make us their economic bitch.
- Russia can have Alaska. I don’t think they want it, though. Maybe Alaska will become independent, and Sarah Palin can finally become president of her own country.
Speaking on behalf of Canada, WA and OR are awesome, we’re so down with that. Washington has Olympic National Park, and Oregon has sea lions (true story, I saw one there once) making them both pretty fantastic, though we will require that the two states combine, for maximum awesomeness, in order to make a sweet new province.
Also, I enjoy how this Russian guy assumes that Canada is able to assert some kind of ‘influence’ over anyone or anything. Come on now, that’s just silly.
